Spiritual Fashion Trends and Confessions of a Lent Licker

When someone tells you they have given something up for Lent, what does that say to you, the person hearing this proclamation? I recently found myself wondering the answer to this question and also, where did Lent originate and what is it really supposed to accomplish or mean?

Okay, so if you look up these questions on the Internet you are going to get a variety of varying answers. There are a lot of things I could share with you about what I read on the history of Lent and being that I am no scholar on the subject, such as some of my friends are, I will refrain from trying to give you any kind of educated answer to these questions outside of my own personal opinions. Read up on it yourself if you want to know more specific information.

From my earliest observations, Lent was something the Catholics did.  If you were raised Baptist, as I was, you probably would have turned your nose up at this practice. But really, more than likely you probably just would have never heard of it…and maybe you still haven’t! However in recent years, maybe the past 8 to 10 years, practicing Lent has become something like a spiritual fashion trend. I discovered Lent about 6 years ago through someone at church and I thought it was a really cool way to sacrifice something for Jesus. I hoped it would help me build a closer relationship with Christ as I depended on Him to just say “no” during Lent to whatever daily treats were on the table that I like to call the “island of temptation” that is exactly 10 steps away from my desk at work. But if I had to be honest I would have to say that anytime I have given up sweets for Lent, a great majority of the reason was because I was hoping to drop a few pounds. I mean, who wants to give up junk food as a New Year’s Resolution when you know you are only going to stick with it for 3 weeks tops. On the other hand Lent gives us a better reason to give up those sweets (at least for 40 days), there is a spiritual incentive, it’s a sacrifice. Right?

So, I have a confession. For the last 6 years I have not once made it all the way through Lent without eating sweets. I am not Catholic, so does this make me less of a person or Christian? Nah. From what I read and understand, the real practice of Lent is to give up meat on Ash Wednesday and all the Fridays, including Good Friday, during the Lent season. There are a few variations to this, which include some other self-imposed limitations during Lent, but for the most part, this is the big one. So, the majority of Catholics are not giving up their sweets! I don’t even like meat that much! If I was giving up meat, trust me I could make it 40 days and beyond without it. Heck, why not just drag it on through the end of summer? But I have always given up sweets because it was my understanding that you give up something you would really suffer without…..for me that is the sweets for sure. So, this weekend I discovered exactly why I have not been able to make it for 40 days without sweets in 6 years. If you have as many sweet tooths (or teeth) as I do, you are totally going to understand my plight.

So, as I was baking my youngest son’s milk chocolate cake with chocolate icing on Saturday, I reminded myself that I was not going to get to eat any of this glorious concoction because I was stupid enough to try and give up sweets for Lent another year. (Side note: Has anyone read the funny definition of insanity that says it is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results? Booyah!!) So, I was putting the icing on the cake, and the cake was still warm and it was all so yummy and wonderful smelling. I will have you know that I did not consume any of that birthday cake. I did not even lick the bowl, spoon, or knife that had the left over cake batter and icing on them. I was not a lent licker! But I was thinking about how hard it was to resist, and how good I was being for not touching that cake, and how much weight I will lose if I succeed at keeping this up for 40 days. And then it dawned on me. I HAVE TWO MORE BIRTHDAYS TO BAKE CAKES FOR DURING LENT!! Ughhh!! All three of my kid’s birthdays are during Lent!! No WONDER!! Who can blame me for giving up and giving in after having not one, not two, but THREE yummy, warm, wonderful birthday cakes baking in my oven!! And don’t even get me started on the torture of serving scoop after scoop after scoop of ice cream on to all those birthday party plates each time!! We are talking three birthdays with three separate parties, which included at least 30 kids total for each year that I had to personally and individually serve this awesome home-baked cake and ice cream to. And that is not counting all the times I passed the earlier mentioned “island of temptation” with cookies (today’s temptation) on display for anyone to enjoy in the workroom! Can any of you empathize?

Monday night, my daughter and I took my youngest son out to dinner for his actual birthday, even though he was spoiled enough at his party Saturday night. We went to a Mexican restaurant first, and then to Chili’s for dessert because that is what they wanted to do. Have you ever had Chili’s Paradise Pie, or Molten Chocolate Cake?? Well, I will let their names speak for them. I had half of the chocolate cake. It was sooooo yummy!! I totally blew Lent again!! This is what made me feel guilty enough to actually want to do a little research on the topic to find out just how bad I really am in God’s eyes by breaking the fast another year. This is also why I say that for some people (not everyone), Lent has become something that is a trendy and fashionable thing to do (or just say you do) to show others you are being “spiritual.” Many of us do not understand or internalize the sincerity, reverence and humility it was meant to involve.

So, for those of us who don’t really know what Lent means or if we had to admit, would say our true purpose in participating is maybe just another way to lose a few extra pounds or gain some attention for our outward sacrifice, let me share with you this scripture that I am going to remember for myself when it comes to fasting and sacrificing.

“And when you fast, don't make it obvious, as the hypocrites do, for they try to look miserable and disheveled so people will admire them for their fasting. I tell you the truth, that is the only reward they will ever get.” Matthew 6:16

Next year, I am giving up meat.

Women like myself have always thought we need a husband in order to have the things in life we think are important.

Do I want to man-bash here?? NO WAY!! Quite the opposite!! But please ladies, stop looking for a man to solve your problems and make you happy!!

I wish I had some magical phrase that could bypass and get through the mental blocks of self-defense we women often use when our friends confront us with this issue. So many times I have wanted to somehow rescue a friend I see making the same mistakes I have made. That is after slapping her, because that is initially what I really want to do, and I wish someone would have done it to me too....well ok, maybe not. It is amazing what women put up with in relationships sometimes because they think he is the best they will ever get and are hanging on to the hope this guy will change. Or they think they need him in order to accomplish or attain something. The excuses we come up with to stay in the situation are ridiculous…and sometimes even comical as I look back and remember my own excuses. Men are great, and when God puts a man and a woman together in Holy Matrimony it is a wonderful thing. But I’m here to tell you ladies, if you are limiting what God can do in your life because you think you need a man to help, you are missing out!! 

Let me TOOT God’s horn a little, or a LOT. Now, I do not live a life of luxury by any means, nor am I completely debt-free – at least not yet, but let me tell you how far the Lord, God Almighty has brought me over the past 20 years. I was a defiant teenager who had little or no self-esteem and lived a life of promiscuity and drugs. I dropped out of high school, just barely a freshman, and got involved with a boyfriend who was an abusive alcoholic and left me alone to raise three children while he was in prison. But GOD raised me up into a life of stability for my children, a good, steady job working around Christian people who loved and cared for me and helped me mature. GOD, not only gave me a place to live, but a house…a home, dependable cars to drive, and even put my daughter through private high school. GOD has even allowed me the opportunity to now pursue my own educational goals. Not one of those things came through a man’s help. They were all provided to my children and I directly from the Lord, Jesus Christ. 

You see, you have to get to a place where you trust the Lord enough to actually depend on Him for everything – I don’t mean just telling people you have faith in Christ – I mean really living out your dependence upon Him. It starts when you let go of that relationship you know you don’t belong in, or letting go of the thought that you are only half of a person without a man. I remember saying once that my "picker" was broken because I obviously was no good at "picking" a man. I realized though that it was not that I was not good, it was just that I chose to ignore the "red flags." You know what I am talking about. You may try to fool yourself but deep inside you know when someone is not good for you but you go along with it because to not go along with it means to be alone again. Give God some credit! He created you for a purpose, so why do you think He has abandoned you and given you no hope but to stay with this guy? He hasn’t gone anywhere, you have! Turn around and see! He hasn’t changed. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. We are the ones who change and run away, and just because some of us changed for the worst or ran too far somewhere along the way doesn’t mean He can’t change it all back around again. Better yet, change us into something better than we ever were before and then pours into the lives of others. God is still in the business of making beauty from ashes. I am living proof of that.

I know these verses may sound a little simple, and they are really. But at the same time they are so profound because they are so simple and true. That doesn't sound like it makes sense probably when you read it, but it made sense in my head so now you are reading it. Anyways, back to the scripture. Rest in these two scriptures for a little while. Let them resonate in your mind and in your heart as you think some things over…….

“Nothing is impossible with God.”Luke 1:37 

 “. . . [He] is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us . . .” Ephesians 3:20